7th October 2014: Sydney, Australia
The MRI is scheduled for tomorrow! A few more days of waiting then I will be getting the next all clear from the doctor. The results will be both a relief plus a reassurance that all is progressing to plan, i.e. I will survive. Importantly, as previously mentioned, I will be able to approach future periods like the one just passed with a sense of normality. Hopefully when experiencing a sore throat, aches or sinus I will be able to just associate it with the flu.
Interestingly, today is the best I have felt since returning home, with plans established for the day including a reintroduction of physical exercise and some light yoga. I did manage to go for a surf, and again slight feelings of nausea surfaced. I attempted some meditation, but instead drifted into a deep sleep. Upon rising blurry eyed, knowing I had missed the chance to do some movement, planning shifted for at least completing a light session of yoga. The very thought process is reflective of my incapacity to value rest. Fortunately, in this instance, I was able to reason with myself, drawing on principles from the designed framework to simply rest.
The matter of resting is pivotal for all of us, and is almost seen as a weakness in the fast paced dominant cultures within both Australia and United Kingdom. Attitudes are influenced by a technological crazed population (I say this whilst typing on my tablet), and my experience of employment consisted of long-hours and weekend work viewed as badges of honour. Admittedly, I was a participating member of this fast paced way of life with limited rest planned into my weekends and the complacency adopted to working over and above requested hours. Obviously, my mind-state still requires attention in rewiring the outlook in relation to the importance of rest and the need to switch off from the internet or my phone. I do believe progress is being made, and responding appropriately to the two hours sleep today is evidence of a shift in mind-state. Obviously rest was needed, and to force myself through this would be putting stress onto my body, a factor completely undesired. and a key focus of my life I am trying to eliminate.