How to define me as an Australian?

26th September 2015: Sydney, Australia
A quote I have recently been able to connect with stated, “Australians are modern day Aztecs who worship the sun”. Admittedly, it is a fairly superficial and individualistic means of expressing my connection with my current of origin, however, it perfectly summarises the attraction to the powers of the sun. Furthermore, the specific focus shows some disconnection with mainstream attitudes and beliefs seemingly predominant within Australia. If refocusing on the sun, there is honestly a significant disparity in my overall outlook and energy when the sun is shining compared to consecutive days where it is cold, wet and dire. The pull towards direct sunlight makes me revise my thinking about this insatiable appetite, and I believe this desire stems from past readings about the proposed healing benefits of receiving natural Vitamin D.

The topic also leads to a questioning of whether living in London for almost four years influenced this longing for the sun. I definitely recall times when I missed the sun, however, the novelty of the experience, combined with the many cultural and social activities kept me occupied. The emerging point from a rather trivial topic is how my priorities have changed over the course of the past 20 months. Furthermore, the chain of thoughts leave me in a place doubtful about my capacity of adapting to such an environment again, even if that means loosing the opportunity of living in one of the most interesting and vibrant cities in the world. In conclusion, it is known that life does not exist without the sun, obviously I am stretching the application of this belief, however, my life seems to depend on the sun, ocean, family and friends. I life definitely wished to live for many years to come.

The healing power of the sun

3rd August 2015: Sydney, Australia

Conversations currently circulating within the community give weight to a summary seen in a past blog whereby the author described Australian’s as modern day Aztecs who worship the sun. It seems the short burst of weather has directly contributed to a vibrancy and happiness evident in most people. A fairly special point, bearing in mind we are in the middle of winter.

The advantages of unlimited access to the sun is clear for the majority of the population, and holds greater significance in my life. The healing benefits of natural Vitamin D are widely documented, and the past two days have further reinforced the need I now feel in my life for sunshine to feature on a regular basis. The slight obstacle facing me results from the current travel restrictions placed upon me by the Australian government. A bizarre decision, especially considering the recommendations of the Professor overseeing my care whereby he stated a warmer climate would me more conducive to my healing. As noted, it is a slight obstacle, meaning other alternatives can be sought. Most notably, exploration of places within Australia to seek the warmer weather. Admittedly, not the worst case, however, the finances incurred with the situation result in some options being less accessible. On reflection, possibly I should simply be happy having the capacity to make a decision to give me the best chance at healing.

Belief: The essential point to survival

7th May 2015: Sydney, Australia

The approaching time away in Indonesia will see a change of climate, with daily temperatures approximately 30 degrees. A point, definitely eliciting a feeling of happiness when considering I will miss most most of the winter here in Sydney. Interestingly, it seems my infatuation with the need for more sunshine stemmed from the fairly lengthy spell in the UK, and it it possibly intensified by reading about the benefits of receiving a regular dose of natural Vitamin D. In addition, the fact of me currently not working results in having more time to pay attention to the environment around me. Therefore, noticeable difference in aspects of the environment, including the amount of sunshine are observed.

Another factor associated with not currently working relates to the current pace of time, and although I am happy, content and attempting to cherish the present. I would lying if I didn’t feel excitement about the prospect of heading to Indonesia, coming off my medication or commence working again. Always whilst on the topic of timeframes, a specific reference comes to mind. It was made by a holocaust survivor whom stated that his life today resulted from a belief of being ok, however, never allowing hope in regards to certain timeframes of a release to be the focus of his thoughts. The person in discussion saw others firmly focused on being released at certain times, and consequently became further deflated and even lead to death upon discovering their time in Auschwitz would not come to their desired end date. Interestingly, the words will remain with me forever, yet, I am unable to implement the advice into my own life.

I say I don’t use drugs… Is that because the Sun is my dealer?

26th October 2014: Sydney Australia

Summer is coming! The difference on my mind and body between a hot balmy summers day opposed to one miserable, cold and wet is not comparable. The sun has become a drug like substance causing a euphoria to flow through my body during it’s peak and then drops me into a flat state of longing and despair when the feeling has faded. I have pondered the reasoning behind the mite of that narcissistic sun being able to draw my utter attention, and am yet to form a solid conclusion. Could my addiction stem from the four years of suffering a Vitamin D deficiency over the course of my stay in London, the loss of body weight I am still lacking, the influence from readings highlighting the healing properties of the sun or just my senses detecting the imminent Australian summer ready to soar into action? For arguments sake, lets take the latter theory, a position whereby one sees the environment as a flowing interconnected system with me intrinsically connected to the open circular process slowly transforming on a daily basis. A system transforming at a pace where the unobservant eye would fail to detect the flowers beginning to bloom after an annual hiatus or the changing of the winds that start blowing on a daily basis from the north rather than the dominating southerly winds common within the Winter months of Sydney.

On a more human level, there does seem to be a degree of accuracy in theories posed about our bodies undergoing changes in preparation for Summer. Mind you, the ever self-promoting sun confuses our bodies by pushing a hot period of weather followed by an onslaught of rain and misery! If we were to get back to the point of whether it is true that our bodies are connected to our changing environment, then does it not seem plausible to think that the capacity of my body to combat the Cancer at the beginning of the year was weakened? Particularly considering the lengthy stay I had in London! The seeds of this chain of thought were first planted in my mind in London when the tumour was first detected. The team of treating doctors asked me to really consider returning to Sydney for the operation, partly due to the level support to be required, however, also to quote, ‘as my body was accustomed to a certain climate for 26 of my almost 30 years, and therefore, was more likely to heal in such circumstances’. I am extremely happy that the idea was suggested, otherwise I would have stayed in London, enduring everything without my family and friends from Australia whilst also suffering in the cold winter. A little off track I know, so, if I am to heal better in the climate my body is accustomed to does that not also indicate that as a preventative measure I should remain in a similar climate to pro-long my chance of survival? The question entails some possible factors or could just derive from that addiction first mentioned in the opening sentence justifying my future thinking to not only stay in Australia, but to chase the sun throughout the winter months to ensure I continuously get my fix!