Does a stigma actually exist?

27th September 2015: Sydney, Australia

I constantly perceive a certain stigma is attached to my Cancer diagnosis. Just to note, I am a single 31 year old man, living downstairs at the house of my parents, and am unemployed. Honestly, you would be right in thinking I am not really the best catch in the world, especially bearing in mind other factors associated with the Cancer I was diagnosed with, namely, the fact of remaining for an unknown period of time on Chemotherapy whilst having an anticipated limited life expectancy. For anyone thinking I am in need of sympathy is incorrect. I am not naive, and understand I am unable to predict the future, however, I have confidence in both my survival and continual progression in my life. In saying that, admittedly, a sense of loss is always easy to locate, particularly when reminiscing on the possible missed opportunities in my life. The question seeming to surface from writing is more a question about my fears stemming from a sense of loss, compounded by changes to my identity. Upon recognising this point, I believe the points just mentioned trump the opening comments about the stigma of Cancer, and simply it is my fears and sense of loss feeding into false projection about the stigma attached to my circumstances.

Miracle, very lucky or something else?

31st July 2015: Sydney, Australia

One point I wish to make clear is the absolute truth in what is to follow, and if there are any doubts, records can be provided to support what I am about to say. I feel the disclaimer is essential, especially when bearing in mind how I have personally processed the information.

Yesterday, I went to the hospital to get a procedure called, Microwave Ablation completed on my left lung, and as previously noted, the procedure intended to eliminate the last remaining Cancer in my body. The story unfolds in the typical way with a nurse calling me into surgery, however, a massive twist shortly followed, leaving my mum absolutely over joyed with elation whilst I was stuck in a state of disbelief. The reasoning behind the reactions results from the doctor coming to advise me that surgery was not required due to the scan taken from two days ago showed the Cancer was no longer present. I had difficulty comprehending the information received, firing off a number of questions, and simply found out there is no medical explanation. The fact of the matter is five weeks ago a scan showed a small Cancer on my left lung whilst the most recent scan showed the Cancer was no longer present. As noted, I was completely perplexed upon hearing, and later processing the information. Fortunately, I also met with the Professor overseeing the entire procedure who confirmed the same information, adding the same multi-disciplinary team who reviewed the latest scans were in the meeting when seeing the latest results. Again, a range of questions were asked, and the response of the a Professor seems to speak volumes, he simply spread his arms open saying there is no explanation, and it is excellent news. So, to conclude, I have a full CT scan in six weeks, am now writing this entry on the balcony of my home with the knowledge of being Cancer free 🙂

Inspirational quote

25th July 2015: Sydney, Australia

Throughout the coming weeks, I will be sharing quotes that continually anchor me to my life, goals and dreama. The first one is extremely brief, yet, speaks volumes. It is so subjective, and my hope is for others to find relevance and adapt into their own circumstances. There quote simply states, “there will be no Plan B in my life”.

Light at the end of the tunnel

22nd July 2015: Westmeed Hospital, Sydney, Australia

I am awaiting the call for another X-ray before having confirmation I can finally leave. Well, it will be more of a temporary hiatus at home before coming back for the final procedure in just over a week. Overall, the time has been successful, and in all honesty, I am easily able to overlook some of the frustrations when weighed against the actual outcomes obtained thus far. A similar outcome next week will be a fitting end to this entire ordeal, leaving me then in a position to direct my attention on recovery and continual progression towards existing life goals. On the matter of existing goals, my personal goals are to strive towards working to optimal health and well-being. In addition, I have had received interest in regards to the framework I designed for people with Cancer. Therefore, it seems a platform is established to launch the programme in partnership with a reputable national organisation in the attempt to seek positive outcomes for those who attend. To conclude, I must state that I am fairly happy with the awaiting options, and feel this minor slip will only further benefit my knowledge and capacity at managing the many future life obstacles to be encountered.

Recovery time from hospital

19th July 2015: Westmeed Hospital, Sydney, Australia

It seems a lot of the contributing stressors in regards to my admission in hospital have ceased whilst the pain is also lessening by the day. In addition, further positive results were obtained from the latest blood samples. Ultimately, meaning I am ready for the first burning procedure scheduled tomorrow. Personally, the unfolding events reinforce the strong belief I have in terms of my future prospects, and I honestly feel I will simlpy be able to reflect on this stage of my life in years to come. The increase in optimism has shifted my thinking towards the period of discharge, and in the first instance my focus will be to recommence gentle yoga once permitted. A change in location is also being considered, namely, a temporary move to Byron Bay to get a taste of the summer earlier than Sydney while also providing an overall environment conducive to my healing and recovery.

The recent dealings with the Australian Government surrounding my benefits has most definitely influenced the decision to temporary explore alternative domestic warmer locations to reside. I will not go into great depths about my recent dealings due to the refusal of allowing such negative emotions to further impact my wellbeing. A brief overview of events entails significant frustration at the inconsistent information received on numerous occasions, a stop of payments, and finally, notification of having the right to travel overseas removed till September 2016. It should be noted that the decision even excludes me from going overseas to seek health treatments to support my health and wellness. A point I strongly disagree, however, as noted, I will not allow such circumstances to negatively influence my outlook. Therefore, all thoughts about this will cease. Instead, I will begin planning for period after my discharge, including where I will live and what goals will be established to work on surpassing any previous levels of health, wellness and success achieved in my life.

Showtime is approaching!

27th June 2015: Sydney, Australia

I have the biggest burst of energy flowing throughout my body and mind. It is magical yet so strange to be in such a state, especially upon hearing confirmation that the tumour is Cancerous. Moreover, it appeared the greedy self-indulgent bugger was lonely last time. Therefore, a few friends have decided to provide company, setting up camp on the the bottom of my right lung. In all seriousness though, I really experience a degree guilt to be feeling levels of elation when seeing the absolute horror on the faces of my parents. How can it be like this? It seems so unfair! I just wish to alleviate the stressors for my parents by overcoming the current obstacle to live a life abundant in love, success and happiness. The life I honestly feel is awaiting me!